Werewolves on Wheels (1971)

It's the early 70s, and a bunch of bearded hippies in denim jackets are riding motorcycles without helmets and smoking grass and changing spark plugs. The establishing shots go on for ages, but the music is alright, daddy-o, so no worries. The bikers beat up a random guy at a gas station.

They go to the gas station's bar (!), show the gas attendant what boobs look like, and dramatically read tarot cards. Then there's another music break while a clipshow of motorcycles plays, and the music is good.

They ride over to a satanist temple to lay in the grass, while satanist monks walk around with bread. The monks offer them wine and bread, which they jokingly accept. They get plastered and pass out while the head monk chants evil incantations. The blackfaced monk sacrifices a cute kitty and throws it in a bonfire to summon satan, talks excessively to himself, and does a little kung-fu dance. Just when you think the satanic summoning is done, it goes on for another 10 minutes, and adds a naked motorcycle groupie with a snake. At the 30 minute mark, the naked woman is dancing enthusiastically to a droning Velvet Underground-style noise jam, and nobody has even suggested a hint of a plot, nor werewolf.

The bikers go on another road trip clip show, the music is good, then they setup for camp. The one who was dancing for the satanists was probably hypnotized or something, and the bonfire freaks her out. Nobody cares, and the bikers dance Små Groderna around the campfire.

Two of them sneak away to make out, and the girl gives the guy a vampire bite. A few seconds later, another couple is ripped apart by vicious dog people. Oh my.

The bikers find the corpses, have a small funeral, and explain it away as an accident plus some coyotes. One biker isn't so sure: "That was no accident. It was heavy. Somebody's controlling the vibes." Oh well, they go for a ride and the music is good.

Despite being monstrous assholes, these men are also much more tender, loving, and comfortable with their sexuality than you typically see. They hug each other and lean on each others' shoulders and tell their pals that they love them. Then they throw molotov cocktails at junk heaps.

Another bike ride, another camp site, another werewolf killing. They're quick, and the wolves are fully obscured from view, which is probably for the best given this film's budget.

The bikers start to get suspicious, and decide to ride back to the monks. They vanish in a sandstorm, followed by the coolest shot of the film, followed by the worst cut of the film. Suddenly they're deep in the desert, forgot what they're doing, and give each other some hugs.

They don't make it to the monks, make a campfire, and some become werewolves. Unfortunately, this time we see their costumes. There's a wildly undramatic torch fight, and eventually they set one of the werewolves alight. There's a motorcycle chase needed to set the other one on fire. The music is good.

The remaining bikers reach the satanic monk temple, go inside, and pass out due to magic spell. And that's the end, they just fall asleep. The music is good.